I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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