So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
