i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
