the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Randomize
