If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
