How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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