did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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