Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
