Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
