At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Shitshow foam night was such a success
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
my poor anus
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
