OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
