Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
It's not a walk of shame if you run
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
