I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
