no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
