he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
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