it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
