Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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