Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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