well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I am never drinking with the goths again.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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