We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
It's never too late to be topless.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
