So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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