I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
third nipple confirmed
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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