Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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