I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i dont even know how to be here
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
