you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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