i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
