you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
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