just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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