it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
