you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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