Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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