Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
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