Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
