Don't you send me to vm
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize