Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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