Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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