Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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