My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
We are two peas in an std pod
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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