Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
