is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I think I sprained my soul last night
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
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