I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
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