So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Randomize
