He is such a slut. More and more my type.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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