My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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