I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
