did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
