Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
