Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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