Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
