I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Found the puke drawer
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
