Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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