You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
