i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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